We have a winner!

WE HAVE A WINNER FOR OUR 264th CAPTION CONTEST!

Our writers dutifully voted for their #1 and #2 captions. Each #1 vote is worth 4 points; each #2 vote us worth 2 points.

And the clear winner, with three #1 votes, totaling 12 points, is:

Jackie Puppet!

Here’s his caption:

Does this mustache go with my dress?

Auntie Lulu and Brian Heinz (each with one #1 vote), and greenworxx and vett (each with two #2 votes) are in second place, each with 4 points:

Auntie Lulu: “I wonder if this tool will be wearing his red dress to prison?”

Brian Heinz: “Well it looks like we lost Mr. Clean to the trans sect.”

greenworxx: “Tranny, liar, nutter, thief…..too bad he’ll soon be full of grief!”

vett: “Now there’s a face not even a mother could love.”

Calgirl is in third place, with one #2 vote and 2 points:

“Check me out: I don’t even require “underwire” or exposed bra straps with this dress. Who knew?”

WELL DONE, EVERYONE!

Congratulations, Jackie Puppet!

For all the other caption submissions, go here.

Be here later today for our next Caption Contest!

~E

Baby cow and orphaned piglet become best buddies!

Take a break from all the chaos in DC and enjoy some cuteness!

DCG

Man saves 24 people during Buffalo blizzard

Hero Jay (behind woman in wheelchair) with people he saved.

From Daily Mail:

“A Buffalo man has been praised for his bravery after saving 24 people from a deadly blizzard that ripped through western New York dumping up to 50.3 inches of snow on the region.

Jay Withey, 27, feared he was going to die entombed in his car where he had been forced to sleep with two strangers after his truck got stuck in the brutal snowstorm.

After a series of rejections to seek shelter, Withey returned to his truck which quickly ran out of gas, it was then the unsuspecting hero identified others stranded and decided to break into a nearby school.

Dubbed ‘Merry Christmas Jay’ Withey and his crew, including seven senior citizens, waited out the storm which has so far taken the lives of at least 40 people, that number set to rise.

‘I walked to the houses to see if I could find shelter, any house that had lights on. I had $500 that I was offering, to sleep on their floor,’ Withey told WBEN. ‘It’s the only time in my life I actually thought I was going to die.’

It was around 6am on Christmas Eve that Withey’s truck ran out of gas and the group had no other choice but to break into Pine Hill Primary Center.

‘Off to the left, I could see there was a school about 600-700 feet away from us. I knew the power would be on, there would be heat in there and I was guaranteeing there would be food in there,’ he said.

According to Cheektowaga Police Department, the group respectfully set up what they needed in the main area of the cafeteria, helping themselves to food to survive the treacherous weather system.

As the storm began to break late Christmas Day and everyone was ready to leave, ‘Merry Christmas Jay’ found the school’s snow blower and cleared all the vehicles that belonged to his group.

Withey then fixed the broken window they had used to get into the school using cardboard and duct tape leaving a note behind apologizing for breaking in.

‘To whomever it may concern, I’m terribly sorry about breaking the school window and for breaking in the kitchen,’ the letter states.

‘Got stuck at 8pm Friday and slept in my truck with two strangers just trying not to die. There were seven elderly people also stuck and out of fuel.

‘I had to do it to save everyone and get them shelter and food and a bathroom. Merry Christmas Jay.’

School officials and the police department were notified of the window breaking and after the roads were safe a police officer checked out the school and found the note which led them to view security camera footage.

Authorities posted a tweet thanking Withey for his ‘heroic actions.’

Read the rest of the story here.

Great job, Jay!

DCG

Former US Navy captain and son rescue pilot from icy creek after crash

Great job, guys!

DCG

Have a Merry Christmas!

Wishing all of you a wonderful Christmas!

In case you need a break, enjoy some of these Christmas classics!

DCG

Family Dog Protects 2 Missing Girls Lost in the Woods

Good boy, Artemis!

DCG

Saturday Funnies!

~E

Hippo swallows 2-year-old boy then spits him up alive!

What an amazing story!

From Daily Mail:

“A two-year-old boy was swallowed and spat out by a hippo while playing near his home in Uganda.  

Paul Iga was clenched in the mouth of the animal around 800 yards away from the edge of Lake Edward.

The hippo had grabbed the toddler from the head and swallowed half of his body when a local man noticed and started throwing stones at the animal, according to The Daily Telegraph

The hippo seemed taken aback by the attack and vomited up the child — before trudging back to the water. 

‘It took the bravery of one Chrispas Bagonza, who was nearby, to save the victim after he stoned the hippo and scared it, causing it to release the victim from its mouth,’ police added. 

While Paul was injured and taken to a clinic for treatment, he miraculously survived. 

It has been reported that the toddler was transferred to a hospital in Bwera but was sent home after taking a rabies vaccine.

In a statement, Ugandan Police said: ‘This is the first such kind of incident where a hippo strayed out of Lake Edward and attacked a young child.’

Police told residents of Katwe Kabatoro Town Council, which is located within Queen Elizabeth National Park on the border between Uganda and the Democratic Republic of the Congo, to remain vigilant around hippos.”

DCG

Old-Fashioned Tip to Scent Your House Like Christmas

I use to buy Scentsy products yet quit doing that earlier this year when the prices of everything kept going up (Build Back Better!) and decided I needed to slow down my spending.

I’m going to give this a try and see what smells I can create!

DCG

The Tranny-Luggage-Thief Caption Contest

This is our world-famous 264th Caption Contest!

Here’s the pic:

About the pic: The bald transvestite in the pic above is Sam Britton, a self-described “non-binary,” who has served since June 19, 2022 as the Biden administration’s deputy assistant secretary of energy. He celebrated his appointment with a Twitter post photo of himself in a chic red dress and high heels. He has a well-documented career leading workshops on “pup play,” a sexual practice in which the partner plays the role of a pet dog within a domination/submission dynamic.

In September, Britton allegedly stole a high-end piece of checked luggage worth over $2,000 from a baggage carousel at the Minneapolis-Saint Paul airport. Video surveillance shows him at the baggage claim despite having checked no luggage of his own. He then appears to take the bag and remove its rightful owner’s nametag. Over the next month, Brinton used the bag as his own on multiple other trips. When eventually questioned by police, he confirmed that the bag was in his possession and claimed he’d made a mistake due to exhaustion. On October 27, Brinton was charged with felony theft of movable property without consent, which is punishable by up to five years in prison and a $10,000 fine. He faces a court hearing on December 19. (Source: Spectator)

You know the drill:

  • Enter the contest by submitting your caption as a comment on this thread (scroll down until you see the “LEAVE A REPLY” box).
  • Body and Soul‘s writers will vote for the winner.
  • Any captions proffered by our writers, no matter how brilliant (ha ha), will not be considered. :(

This contest will be closed at the end of Tuesday, December 20, 2022.

‘To get the contest going, here’s my caption:

Just another freak to add to an already criminal administration.

For the winner of our last Caption Contest, go here.

~E